Say Yes to the Dress

Over the past month, I have watched Say Yes to the Dress a few time. I have learned some things and I think brides can learn so much by watching other brides' experiences.
The one reoccurring theme that keeps coming up is that someone the bride brings to the appointment is trying to talk her out of the gown she really loves. It ranges from the mother, mother-in-law to be, the maid of honor, best friend, fiance, and the list continues. The show that I watched last night even had a person who works in the store looking for a gown. She is aware of the problems that others have had with bringing the wrong friend but stated that she just didn't think it would happen to her.
I think this is always what the bride thinks. My friends, mother, so on, are so close to me that they will automatically like the same thing that I like. Well, sometimes weddings are different. So here are some things to consider when deciding who to bring to the salon to try on gowns.

1. Mother- Although your mother is usually the first choice be aware of how the two of you shop together. Do you always agree on clothing styles or do you disagree. If you do not agree on everyday clothing, chances are you will also not agree on wedding attire. But if Mom is holding the purse strings, she will definitely want to be a part of the shopping experience. Just be ready for some tough decisions if you are not in agreement.

2. Newly married friend (or any friend)- Chances are that someone in your wedding party is newly married if this is your first wedding. Beware! Although they may not have been pushy or bossy in the past, somehow planning their own wedding makes them an expert on all weddings. Some ex-brides want to try to fix everything that went wrong with their own weddings or do things they were not able to do in their weddings through someone else. Other just don't want someone else to have a "better" wedding in their perspective than they had. I had kept a couple of secrets from my bridesmaid until the day of the wedding. Just before going down the aisle, one of them stated to me, "You always did have to be different and better than anyone else." Ouch! Was I shocked. Luckily, that was the worst of it.

3. Fiance- The owner at the Atlanta store, Lori, has a strict southern policy that the groom should be nowhere near the store while the bride is trying on gowns. In this modern age there are many couples that do not put much stock in the old superstitions but just remember that if you are having a difficult time trying to make a decision, maybe it is because he is there. Are you still thinking that it is bad luck for the groom to see the bride in the gown before the day of the wedding? Also are you thinking about the wow factor when he sees you coming down the aisle? Maybe it really does make a difference to you.

So just remember that you do not need multiple people helping you to decide on the gown of your dreams. Be very selective on who to invite to the salon. I have worked with brides who come in alone or with just one other person. Sometimes they will want someone else to see the gown before making the final decision which is also okay. I have also worked with much larger groups that have been really great. The key is finding the right combination for you.

My final advice:

A. As always, don't give your money to someone you don't trust. If you are not happy with the salon, find another one.

B. Don't be pressured into buying something by someone. This includes someone from the salon or your friend, mother or fiance.

C. If you don't find the gown of your dreams on the first visit, that is okay. If at anytime during the appointment, you are uncomfortable, ask to end this appointment and make a new one. I would much rather have a second chance with a bride than to have buyers remorse later. If the problem is someone who came with you, don't ask them along the next time. If the problem is the consultant, ask for a new one the next time. If the problem is the salon, go to a different one.

D. And the final thing to remember is that, it is YOUR day. Well,the groom can share a little bit, but even most grooms feel that the day is for the bride. Don't be afraid to stand up for what you want in a gown. (This also applies to the bridesmaid gowns. They are a part of YOUR day. They should be willing to sacrifice for what you want.)